171. Best entertainment ever!

The neighbours are back from holiday. The kids are happy to have friends to play with and us mothers delighted to have someone to chat to over a cup of tea.

'How was your break back home? Did you have a good time?'

I ask while I am putting the kettle on; yet I am concentrating more on the tea-making rather than the conversation. I know the answer to this question: yes, wonderful, so good, etc ... 

'No! It was terrible! We are so glad to be home!'

That almost throws me in the tea-making process. I try to sound genuine in my concern but truly I cannot think it could be that bad. Like a teenager I roll my eyes thinking typical of these mums around here who have nothing to do but polish their nails ... I am almost about to tell her about how writing a blog can help when I see her dismayed look. Immediately I feel bad for having such nasty thoughts. What a bad neighbour I am!

'What happened?'

'Oh, all sorts of things ... First, it was winter there so it was cold and wet and grey and horrible and I missed the sun. We all did. Even my husband.'

How could that man miss the sun I thought. The only time I saw him outside was going from the car to the house. And technically it does not count as outside as it was through the garage ... Again the bad woman in me, so to make up for it I smile stupidly. Better to pass for stupid than nasty. I don't think my distressed neighbour takes notice as she continues her story.

'But we had two weeks booked on a resort, in a nature reserve. A gated community like here but with guards and patrolling cars.  We met my brother's family there. We'd been here lots of times before.  It was nice to see everyone, you know, family, ... but ... we got attacked by some burglars ....

The tea looks pathetic, I should have offered something stronger. I feel really bad again, selfish ... I find it hard to commiserate. My bad news about the holidays are a kid falling off a tree or one eating stuff he shouldn't or falling in a muddy puddle as we are heading to a family lunch.

'Oh my goodness! Anyone hurt?'

'No, we are all fine. No-one was hurt ... They just left ...' 

And then she tells me the whole story and I am glad we holidayed in the Cantal. Hazard identification: cows behind rickety fences, mud, old stone walls. Risk assessment: null if you know how to handle all this.

'It was in the middle of the day. Broad day light. I was upstairs with Katie and everyone was kind of dozing or resting. The whole house was quiet and very peaceful. 

'They maybe thought everyone was out?'

'I don't think so. They say this is more and more common ... Anyway only Jake was downstairs playing video games. He was the only one downstairs. ...

I poured more tea and went to get biscuits. If I didn't get the all-butter chocolate chip cookies from Scotland out now I never would. They'd go stale, life was rarely that dramatic.  

'They literally walked in, all dressed in black, black all over from their feet to their heads, tight black clothes and black balaclavas and all parts of the body were covered. They walked in pointing guns and said. Give us everything! ... Jake told us he just pointed to the stairs. We had heard the commotion and my husband and I knew right away. We went to the top of the stairs, told everyone to stay put and be quiet and gathered cash, jewellery, and ... walking slowly towards them my husband gave them all this. Then they ... They looked around. The three of them ... and they had their guns pointing in all directions, covering everything except their backs. But behind them out there I could see a car waiting. ... They go from house to house. My husband made a wide gesture with his arms suggesting they could help themselves to whatever they wanted ... They moved the guns towards the electronics and grabbed whatever phone, iPad and laptop was around and ran to the car and the car drove off.'

'My goodness!'

I am in a state of shock just listening to her. I cannot imagine what it must be like to go through this.

'What about the kids? It must have been traumatising for them!'

'Well, Lilly stayed upstairs and never witnessed anything. She cried over her iPod with all her photos and music. She was a bit stressed afterwards but I think she will be all right.'

'Jake?'

'Oh! Jake! You know ... his birthday was coming up ... and so he thought it was all a kind of staged surprise party for him! So he never even got scared ... '

This is even more shocking to me! I look at her and she leans back in the armchair, sighs, and tells me.

'It was only when everyone was gone and the panic settled in and that we all realised how much we'd lost that he started to believe it was for real.'